The Girl Is Crafty

Something strange is going on around here....The other morning I wore diamond earrings when I walked the dog (ok, ok, faux diamonds, but still). I put cucumbers in my water this afternoon - a simple treat, but it feels so luxurious. I painted my toes red and I'm preparing to order seeds for my garden. To top it off, on a whim, I turned one of hubby's old button up shirts into a super cute apron. But then again, isn't that how all good crafts should start: with whimsy? It seems whimsy is in the air around here and it's intoxicating. In fact, hubby even noted this afternoon, "You seem cheerful." What a perfectly delightful compliment. I feel cheer-full and it's amazing.



I'm not one for New Year's Resolutions as I think change happens all the time and should begin whenever the urge strikes. But, I have to say my urge for change coincided with 1-1-11 this year and I am eager to embrace it and follow where it leads. It's a fire in my belly, a God nudge, calling me to make everyday special and indulge my creative crazies. So, no more waiting for holidays to bring out the special dishes or asking, "Is that too much glitter?" I mean, could there be a more perfect time to get creative? It's almost Valentine's Day: hearts, candies and ribbons, oh my. I can almost taste the conversation hearts already and I can hardly stop myself from hanging a big, pink and red glittery heart on my front door with the word "Love" emblazoned in roses... Is that too much? Um, no....



We've taken this delicious approach with school this semester too. We've put away our boring text books for a bit and we're shaking it up. We read, read, read and then we draw and color and then we garden and then we read again and then we get a little crafty and then we read some more. The girls are having so much fun and are learning a ton. I love being snuggled up on the couch with some coffee and hot chocolate and knowing that yes, they are getting an education. I can't imagine sending them off for seven hours a day to let someone else have all that fun with my kiddos. Right now we are reading Harry Potter V, Anne of Green Gables and Three Cups of Tea together. Jilly is reading Mouse & The Motorcycle and King Arthur, while Emma enjoys the Black Stallion and The Biography of Eli Whitney (fascinating btw.) It's a delightful way to learn and an even more delightful way to teach.



So, tomorrow I think I'll put on a little red lipstick, make heart shaped pancakes for breakfast and celebrate the holiday. Which one? Not sure yet, but I'll find one and be sure to give it proper attention. Everyday is a gift from God. Here's to unwrapping it!

In His Service

Autumn Perspective

I've been tormenting myself every morning by watching the weather reports on the Today show and coveting the fall weather in other parts of the country. The worst part comes when Al Roker puts up the map colored in red, orange and yellow to show the peak of fall foliage so we can plan our trips to see the colors change. Then, I look at my neck of the woods and it's still mostly that awful brown color which translates to: I'm sorry, you need actual trees to see the tree leaves change color. But that's okay (I tell myself) one quick 2 hour drive north and I can have fall. Now, if I could just find a way to box it up and spread a little around here....

As is our norm, we have tried our best to create fall in our home. The pumpkins are out, the scarecrows hung up and the leaves spread around. Admittedly its a little disappointing to look past the vibrant reds and golds of our faux fall to see my children swimming, still, in stinkin' October... But I know come January and 65 degree temps and sunny days, I will hear my husband say, "This is why we live here." And, I will have to admit that he's right, as he is almost always.

Despite the fact that my complaints seemed to have peaked with the fall foliage, this fall has been full of reminders of how good our God is and how abundantly He blesses us. This was no more clear to us than on September 26, 2010 when Erik, Emma and I had the honor of baptizing Jilly. And, if I'm honest, although Erik and I were in the baptistery too, it was overwhelming to see my daughter baptize her sister. It was a glorious day shared with friends and family. The memories of this once in a lifetime event are forever etched in my mind and I am truly thankful for each and every one of them.

The family we were honored to build a house for - Miguel, Cynthia and Anna.
Our fall continued with a trip to Rocky Point, Mexico. We went on a mission trip with the high school ministry to build houses in the barrios with an amazing group called One Mission. This was a trip Erik and I decided not to go on earlier in the summer. We decided that we could not afford the trip with the registration fees and the passport I would need. We decided that we would, instead, spend that weekend as we had planned at a Jack Johnson concert. The tickets were a birthday present from Erik and the concert is something we have always wanted to do. End of story, our minds were made up. We had decided and planned and were totally comfortable with our choice. Right....Well, you can see how much deciding we did and you are probably laughing about as much as God did during all of this planning. I went to lunch with a friend who shall remain nameless, and Kristina Harbour challenged me to rethink my decision and pray about the trip. Pray? Ask God what He wanted me to do? Hmmm, novel concepts and so crazy they might just work. So, we did. We talked and prayed and prayed and talked. I would like to say at this moment the sun broke through the clouds, we had our ah ha moment and realized we should go to Mexico. But, no. We decided we were not going to be guilted into going to Mexico. I'll pause here while you finish laughing....OK? Then, we went to church. The entire sermon was about getting out of your comfort zone and into the faith zone, taking risks, obeying God..really? Are You serious right now? By the end of the sermon Erik was squeezing my hand so hard I knew we were going to Mexico. But, just in case we needed confirmation, as we stood up to leave, the music they played on the speakers? You guessed it: Jack Johnson. Sometimes God whispers, and sometimes He shouts. We heard Him loud and clear.



Sweet Anna

And? Mexico was amazing and totally worth giving up my Jack Johnson tickets. We spent three days with awesome high school students building houses for really amazing families. The bonds formed between those of us in the ministry, the fellowship with the families, serving God - all of this was great. But none of it compared to what Emma said as we pulled into our driveway after the trip - exhausted, dirty, beat....She said, "Oh my gosh. Our house is like a mansion." Perspective was perhaps God's biggest blessing of that weekend.

Perspective is something I am lacking when I sit in my air conditioned home and complain about the heat. Perspective is what I lack when I stare at a pantry full of food and lament that we have nothing to eat. Perspective is missing when I think money is tight simply because I cannot afford to go to a museum this week. I have never been starving or homeless. I do not know what it is to want for anything. I gained perspective. I'm not sure I could have walked away from a concert with a gift like that.

Truth

Taking a break from the usual family update to share whats on my heart. Actually, this was what was on my heart a couple months ago. I wrote it and chickened out from sharing it. In response to a conviction to not operate from a place of fear, here goes...

Ok, the book writing thing: The bad news is I haven’t given it much attention in awhile. The good news is I had a total breakdown with dear hubby as I read what I had written so far and lamented the fact that I had quit working on this project. He did what any good husband should do; he scolded me. I needed a good verbal spanking quite frankly. I was scared to that point to call this what it is and even more scared to finish it. I said out loud to my husband and my children: I am an author and I am going to finish my book. It was remarkable. We all cried and hugged it out and then my sweet little seven-year-old looked up into my eyes with her big beautiful hazel eyes and said through a flood of tears, “I feel like you love me less everyday.” What the….? Warm fuzzies gone, mother’s guilt here. Ah, the universe is just as it should be.

Seriously, we got past that; I told her I love her more today than yesterday but not as much as tomorrow. Yes, I know it’s a totally cheese ball seventies song but the kid doesn’t know that and it solved my problem. Well, it solved my problem until she quotes me to her pastor this Sunday…oh well, I’ll deal with it later.

So now I have a level of accountability in place. I’m back at it, ready to hear the big messages from God about who I am supposed to be. I went hiking this morning and it was amazing. I was at peace and the wind was blowing. It’s July in Arizona, this may very well qualify as a miracle. You know the wisdom received today? Do more alone. Short, but not sweet. This didn’t feel like a little message to me at all, no this was one of my first doozies. I never do anything alone except grocery shop and hike. Well, that’s not exactly true either. When ever possible I coax my husband into shopping with me and my pseudo adopted teen daughter into hiking with me. What is my fear of being alone? Where did that come from?

I’m afraid to make the wrong decision. There I go operating out of fear again. I need to start making decisions all on my own without the input or advice of anyone. Not the big stuff mind you. I understand that major life decisions (MLDs) should be made with dear hubby and possibly with the advice of other Godly people. But I’m not talking about the MLDs. It’s the little stuff that should really be up to me that I need to go it alone on – yeah, that stuff paralyzes me. You know what else? I never take credit for my own ideas – ever. If I am talking to a friend and I have something clever to say, I always give credit to my husband or even lie and say I read it or heard it somewhere. That is certifiable crazy behavior. Am I seriously afraid that if I take credit for something my friend will either think that a) I’m a snob, or b) I am lying and heard my little nugget from someone really qualified, a.k.a. Beth Moore? Truth? Yes.

I also realized I don’t like rules, more specifically, directions. Now there are some directions and rules that are good and necessary, i.e. the 10 Commandments, or driving laws for instance. But other rules and directions are a big waste of time. I like to sew. I hate, with as much passion as one can hate inanimate objects, patterns. I loathe them. Should that stop me from doing something I really like? Um, no. Hey look at that, all this time I thought I was a goody-two-shoes and the truth is I am a rebel. I am a rule breaker. Watch out expensive fabric everywhere, here I come with scissors and no directions. This feels good, dangerous, but good.

I have been living my life either on pause or with the mute button permanently engaged. Scary as it is, I’m done with that. I want to dance in the freedom that Jesus gave me and I want to live out loud without concern for what others think of me. I have not been true to myself for the last almost 33 years. I cannot be true to God if I am not true to myself.